Facebook Publication Date: 6/11/2020 14:06

Breaking out another comment from community and Sustainer Circle member, Laura Berwick.

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Part of using my mental or emotional status as an excuse to delete fitting into supremacy is… ableist appropriation and distortion of a disability? And appropriate and weaponization is something I, as a white woman, have a lot of ingrained training in. Like, yes, I take medication for anxiety and depression, but I also feel sad, upset, and nervous as a stimulus-caused, transitory, emotional/mental response that is not part of my background brain chemistry. Part of holding myself is recognizing what exactly is contributing to my whoosh and managing that myself.

If I get upset by push-back to something I’ve said, and I get activated, it’s up to me to manage that, not assume it’s perfectly okay for uniquely individual and exceptional me to let go of my emotions, do the violence of deleting a thread (after, probably, unbridled-self-expressing all over it) and then blame my disorders, AND blame someone else for triggering something I might purport is outside of my control. The sense I would have that these disorders are tools/weapons I can use to excuse my behavior, when, of course, I really am NOT unique in having those disorders, is a huge expression of supremacy. White supremacy leads me to USE people, including aspects of my own self.

I think I’m saying this in the most complicated way possible. But it’s something I think I need to pay real attention to the nuances of.

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